Yeah, so it's 4 AM. So what in tarnation am I doing awake and in front of the computer? Welcome to the world of Zyrtec-D. When these late-onset seasonal allergies (that's what I'll call them, because it makes me sound like a doctor, it does) began a couple of years back, my crack squad of attack allergists cycled through prescriptions of every available allergy drug in the Western world, and even some from beyond (black centipede meat I am looking at you).

Zyrtec-D is the big failure. I have a metric ton of it sitting around unused, as I wound up taking it for about 6 months before giving up. It gave me insomnia and a host of other nasty side effects, and it raised my blood pressure, too. You see, the "D" in Zyrtec-D stands for, I am told, Decongestant, however it may as well be a totem of the Darkest evil which lurks in the hearts of humankind for all its Dicking around it did with my health. I only tolerated it for as long as I did because, out of all the allergy drugs I had taken, it was the only one to put even a slight dent in my prime symptom of discord - the nasty post-nasal accoutrements I had to put up with daily. If you happened to find yourself in the same room as I in the last two years, the frequency with which I have had to cough and grind my throat in a most guttural attempt to clear it is likely enough to send you out the window onto the waiting asphalt below.

I now pay the price of my foolishness as I try to cajole myself back to sleep.